Thanksgiving.
What's not to love? You have the cooking, the wine, the beer, the mimosas, the football, the friends, the family...the the the...
Well-this time of year I always kind of shut down. I hate it.
To me it is a reminder of the fact I have been forced to have sex too many times against my will. How can I be thankful on a day that reminds me of rape?
Too shocking? Stop reading!
Well, I am truly thankful to be alive. That almost didn't happen many times. I am thankful for food. There were many times I didn't have any, and many more that I did but couldn't eat it. I am thankful for family since at one time mine had abandoned me. I am thankful for warmth since I spent many days and nights cold. I am thankful for a home since I didn't have one to call my own for years. I am thankful for makeup because I love to look pretty....
*Sigh*
Looking pretty...Is that where my problem lies? Maybe. Maybe it was just location, means and opportunity...
A tiny female in a tiny car, on a dark street, alone in downtown Detroit the night before a major holiday beckons to be kidnapped, held at gun point and tortured-right? I guess so. I'm at peace with the fact I put myself there. Now what angers me is the polices reaction-or lack there of...
I watch forensic shows all the time, even in a small town, such a case would have at least received some attention a rape kit, fingerprinting, a sworn statements-something. If there was DNA on file maybe they could have prosecuted the demon-he had already been to jail...something, anything and I could have got my justice. Ack!!! Unfortunately, I will never get any.
Fuck the police!
I'm also mad at a few friends and family members that refused to accept that it happened. See also: a few people that chose to pressure me for more excitement during sex this time of year.
This shit happens, it happened to me. Fuck the whole bunch of you!
Hello C-PTSD can we get past this someday, please? Thanks!
I am thankful for my sobriety this year. Good job, lets keep it up. Lets not let this holiday reminder of something tragic ruin all we have accomplished. It's just a holiday-a date on a calendar...try not to let anything get you down. Honestly, no matter how much you drink, you'll hate yourself more in the morning.
You're safe, you're warm, you have a great family-bask in all they have to offer and hold your little girl a little closer tonight.
Fuck anyone/thing trying to get you down. Stay home if you need, be alone. Nothing is worth ruining how far you have come.
Be thankful-you survived!
Love and thanks this day and everyday you're awesome. Stay Strong.
Happy Thanksgiving!
-Adree Does Eat
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